Manners

Almost a week after the death of Marco Antonio, we had promised to visit his family in Yapacani. We had been planning to leave Arboleda (where we were seeing patients) around lunchtime, not certain if we'd have lunch before or after the excursion. Since it was our last day in Arboleda before heading back to the real clinic in Palacios, the community prepared us a big lunch, complete with speeches which we were required to attend. Lunch is the big meal of the day here, and this one was colossal, complete with beef, chicken, fish, salad, arroz con queso (unbelievably rich and delicious), yuca, and potato salad.

At about 2 pm with stuffed bellies, Joe, David, Guinda, and I started the 40-minute drive to Yapacani. We were very warmly received and introduced to Marco's grandmother and two siblings (the other was still in school). Then we were sat at a table and fed soup. We all glanced at each other as if to ask "We really have to eat this, don't we?". We did our best and just pleaded that the meal only consisted of soup. I don't remember the last time I've felt that full, but it would have been a terrible display of manners to do anything differently.

I had brought a framed photo of us with Marco at the hospital on his second day there (I think it's in a previous post) and was dreading the tears that would flow when I handed it over. When they started thanking us for our help, I decided it was an appropriate moment. Then Cristina brought out Marco's old notebooks to show us what a good student he was. She brought out all the other photos she has, just a couple of school photos. It was still unbelievable to think that he's gone. Cristina showed us the river near the house where Marco used to play and fish. Then she brought us to see his one-year-younger brother at the school who looks just like him, but very healthy. The visit brought me closure, but made it clear what a long period of grieving they will endure.